A Warden's letters
by gamer072196
Summary: Theron Mahariel has been Warden-Commander of Fereldan for two years when he hears of Jonathan Hawke's exploits. He sends a letter to Hawke, hoping to meet him in Kirkwall and discuss the possibility of him joining the Grey Wardens. When he learns about Merrill's situation and what she is doing, he tries to sway her from her dangerous path. There are unintended consequences though..
1. Theron & Hawke

_From Vigil's Keep in Amaranthine to the Hawke estate in Kirkwall_

To Jonathan Hawke,

You do not know me… at least not personally. You likely know me as the 'Hero of Fereldan' or the 'Fereldan Warden-Commander.' What most people do not know is my actual name. I am Theron Mahariel. I will keep this brief: I have heard of your exploits and wish to meet you in person. If you wish to meet me as well, I will be traveling to Kirkwall and shall arrive three days after you receive this letter. I must request discretion as I have many enemies who might take advantage of this meeting. Let no one else see this letter and bring no one with you. I shall do the same to ensure we meet as equals.

Sincerely,

Theron Mahariel, Warden-Commander of Fereldan.

_Hawke's reply._

To Warden-Commander Theron,

I accept your request. I shall be waiting alone at the docks for your ship.

Sincerely,

Jonathan Hawke

* * *

_Kirkwall's docks, near Theron Mahariel's personal ship._

"The stories of Kirkwall do nothing to prepare one for this…," Theron says, examining his surroundings in a mixture of awe and intimidation.

The docks are filled with people walking about. Some are dockworkers or sailors. Some are citizens of the city.

The rest, however, are Fereldan. Refugees who came to Kirkwall to escape the Blight over a two years ago, and were now trapped in the city due to a poverty that likely didn't exist for them when they fled their homes from the darkspawn.

Theron catches the attention of a few of the refugees and some others. The refugees open their eyes wide, blink a few times, and shake their heads trying to make sure they aren't just seeing things. Soon they realize that their eyes aren't playing tricks on them, the Hero of Fereldan has arrived in Kirkwall.

Theron notices all of this, of course, and shrugs it off. _I guess I should get use to it._ He scans the crowd, searching for Jonathan Hawke.

From the description he received, Hawke was a tall man with short, blonde hair and green eyes. It was also implied that Hawke may be a mage, and an apostate at that. Of course, the word 'apostate' meant nothing to him, nor would it mean anything to any Dalish. But Hawke was drawing a lot of attention to himself, and that meant that the Templars were that much more likely to take notice.

Theron had also heard rumors that Anders was somewhere in the city. Though he wanted to search for his old friend, his priority was to meet with Hawke. _Besides, if I go looking for Anders, he'll assume that I'm trying to bring him back to the Wardens._

While Anders' leaving the Wardens caused an argument between them, Theron held no grudge. He just wanted to make sure that Anders was fine and keeping away from the Templars.

Theron looks over to his left and sees Hawke standing near a stack of crates, alone. He walks over to him, keeping an eye on the guards and some of the more shady figures on the docks.

"Jonathan Hawke?" Theron asks.

"You must be Theron Mahariel," Hawke replies, offering his hand in greeting.

Theron grasps Hawke's hand and shakes it, acknowledging the gesture. "A pleasure to meet you."

"The pleasure is mine. I certainly wasn't expecting a letter from someone as distinguished as yourself."

"I keep an eye and ear out for talent. When I heard of your skill, I had to meet you."

"I'm honored that you thought my skills were impressive."

"You **have** been making quite the name for yourself. That would be quite dangerous for you if everything that I have heard is true."

"What do you mean?"

"I have heard that you are a mage. And an apostate. While that means nothing to me, I wouldn't be so sure that others wouldn't tell the Templars of this."

"It is true that I am a mage, as my father was and as my sister was."

"You have a sister?"

"Had. She was killed by an ogre as my family was trying to escape Lothering."

"I am sorry. I know what that must have felt like."

"Thank you. Now, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"I apologize, but I would prefer to speak in private. Would you follow me to my ship? We can speak there more openly there."

"Of course. Just as long as it is just the two of us. The last ship I was on was filled with refugees and cargo."

"Follow me then." Theron turns around and they head to his ship. Halfway there, however, Theron is stopped by a guard.

"Halt, elf," the guard orders. "What is your business in the docks?"

"I have come on personal business," Theron responds plainly.

"'Personal business,' eh? I think you are here to steal something. Come with me."

"What do you think you're doing?!" one of the refugees shouts, running over to the guard.

"What does it look like? I'm taking this elf back to the alienage to make sure he doesn't cause trouble." Some of the refugees start to take notice, as well as a few guards.

"He is no ordinary elf. That's Hero of Fereldan!"

"Him? You must be joking. There is no way that the 'Hero of Fereldan' is some pathetic elf." More refugees take notice and some approach the scene, as well as a handful of guards.

"He is telling the truth," Theron explains.

"Why should I believe you?"

"Do you really want to take that chance?" Hawke asks. "What do you think Guard-Captain Aveline will do when she finds out that you forced the Hero of Fereldan into the alienage?"

"I… uh… I apologize messere." The guard turns around and returns to his post, ashamed. The other guards return to their posts as well.

"Thank you for you assistance," Theron says to the refugee, thanking him.

"You are very welcome messere," the refugee responds with a bow of his head. "Some of the guards are like that to elves. At least they got a home, unlike my family."

"I am very sorry to hear that. Here, take this." Theron reaches into his pocket and hands the refugee five sovereigns.

"Five sovereigns? I-I can't accept this."

"Take it. Buy some food for your family."

"I- Thank you messere!" The refugee bows his head respectfully and rushes off joyfully.

"May we continue?"

"Of course."


	2. Will Hawke join the Wardens?

_In Theron's cabin aboard his personal ship._

Theron's cabin wasn't anything like what Hawke expected it to be. Rather than the expensive cloths and jewelry he expected, there was weapons and jewelry of Dalish make as well as busts of the Dalish gods, which were likely of Dalish make too. He recognized them from when he went to talk to Keeper Marethari in her clan's camp. That's when he realized that Theron was, indeed, Dalish. Theron's tattoos finally made sense. Hawke had felt like the tattoos seemed familiar, but he couldn't remember where he saw them before. Then he remembered Marethari mentioned that someone named 'Mahariel' had been taken from them by a Grey Warden to fight the Blight. _Could this be the same Mahariel?_

"You're Dalish, correct?" Hawke asks before Theron begins.

"Yes," Theron replies. "Most humans can't figure that out unless they see us in the forests near our clans, I'm surprised you can."

"I met a Dalish clan in Sundermount. I spoke to their Keeper, Marethari."

"Marethari? That's… That's my clan."

"It is?"

"Yes. I didn't think they went this far north. How is the Keeper? And her First, Merrill? What about Master Ilen? And Pol?"

"The Keeper is fine. As is Merrill, but she is no longer First. She lives in the alienage now."

"What? Why?"

"She did something and the rest of the clan has shunned her for it. All except for the Keeper, who wanted her to stay and apologize for what she did."

"What did she do? It would have to be serious for the clan to hate her for it. We're family."

"I don't know. No one wanted to talk about it."

"Then it is definitely serious. Serious enough that no one mentions it. Do you know where Merrill lives? I have to speak with her. Find out what she did."

"I know where she is but, I'm not sure that she would talk to you. It seems like she doesn't feel she deserves to see you."

"I… see. Could you at least talk to her? Get her to meet me somewhere? Tell her that I want to help."

"I will try, but I might need something for me to give her because she may not believe me just because I say so."

"Of course. Here, give this to her. The Keeper gave me this when I left the clan with Duncan." Theron hands Hawke a ring of Dalish make. It has various inscriptions of animals and plants carved on the outside of the ring and is made out of a very durable wood.

"I will talk to her once we are finished with what you wanted to discuss with me."

"Thank you. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate this. It has been too long since I last saw any my clan."

"Anything for the Hero of Fereldan."

"No matter how many times I hear someone call me that, I never get used to it. Please, just call me Theron."

"Of course. What did you want to want to talk to me about?

"I actually wanted to ask you something."

"What?"

"Would you like to join the Grey Wardens?

"The Grey Wardens? Are you serious?"

"Why would I joke about that? It is a very serious decision."

"I just never imagined being asked to join the Wardens."

"Why not? You traveled deeper into the Deep Roads than anyone thought possible. And into a thaig that the durgen'len had completely forgotten about."

"'Durgen'len'?"

"Oh. I apologize. That is what we Dalish call the Dwarves. It means 'children of the stone' just as shem'len means 'quick children.'"

"You mean humans?"

"Yes."

"Well, I certainly wasn't expecting to be asked to join the Grey Wardens. I need to know more."

"You know the Grey Wardens can sense darkspawn, correct? The Joining gives us that ability though it isn't exactly safe. And if you survive, you won't be able to return to your old life."

"So you're a Grey Warden for life?"

"You **can** leave the Wardens, but you still have the taint for the rest of your life."

"So Anders really was a Grey Warden after all."

"You know Anders?"

"Yes. He's the one who gave me the map of the best entrances to the Deep Roads near Kirkwall. He said he was a Grey Warden before they made him get rid of his cat."

"That's definitely the Anders I know. I found that cat at Vigil's Keep and gave it to him. Can you tell me where he is? Or, at least, tell me where he is?"

"He has a clinic in Darktown, but he doesn't want to go back to the Wardens."

"I know. I just want to talk to him. He's my friend. Have you decided whether you want to join the Wardens?"

"Hmm… I have to say no."

"Any specific reason why?"

"I need to take care of my mother. My brother joined the Templars and my uncle is a deadbeat. I'm the only one that can keep her safe."

"I can respect that. Duncan almost had to drag me from my clan when I was recruited."

"Then why did you join?"

"It was either that, or die a slow, painful death from the Blight. Joining the Wardens saved my life, in a way. At least, for the time being."

"'For the time being?'"

"Never mind. It was a pleasure talking with you."

"The pleasure was mine." Hawke turns around and leaves. _What did he mean, 'for the time being?' I should ask Anders. He'll be able to explain._


	3. Theron & Anders

_From Theron's personal ship to Anders' clinic (sender left anonymous)_

Hello Anders,

It's Theron. It has been quite a while since we last spoke. Don't jump to conclusions, I'm not trying to bring you back to the Wardens. I just wanted to see if you took my advice for keeping out of sight because, if you are, you haven't gotten the attention of the Templars or the city guard. Is there any chance we could meet somewhere? Just to catch up, I promise. I have a ship at the docks and I should be in Kirkwall for a week or two. Please reply.

Your friend,

Theron.

_Anders' reply_

To Theron,

I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss all the fun we had in Amarathine, but I am doing good work here. I have been helping refugees survive and helping mages to get out of Kirkwall. Also, I'm worried that meeting with you might bring unwanted attention to both of us. Even if that weren't the case, I have far too much work to do.

Your old friend,

Anders

P.S.: How did you find out where I was? And why are you in Kirkwall in the first place?

_Theron's reply_

Anders,

That is too bad. I was looking forward to seeing you again. As to how I found you and why I'm in Kirkwall, I am in Kirkwall on official business and I heard about your clinic. I didn't get a specific address, otherwise I might have dared to surprise you. I hope you keep up the good work. I also hope to see you in the future.

Your friend,

Theron


	4. Theron & Merrill

_From Merrill's hut in the alienage to Theron's personal ship_

To Theron,

Hi! It's Merrill. When Hawke told me you were in Kirkwall, lethallin, I didn't believe him until he showed me the ring the Keeper gave you the day you left the clan. The whole clan misses you. The Keeper most of all. Hawke told me that when he met you, he told you about me and the clan… I know you want to help, but when you find out what I did, you'll hate me too. I don't think I could bear that. I miss you, but I don't think I deserve to see you again… Not after what I have done.

Sincerely,

Merrill

P.S.: Hawke helped me write this letter. It is so strange to talk to others like this.

_Theron's reply_

Merrill,

It is good to hear from you lethallan. I suppose you are still getting used to living amongst the shems? It was strange for me too. There are still things I do not understand about them. Why do they insist on keeping mages separate from everyone else? It seems so childish to me. Now Merrill, I still want to see you. It has been so long since I have seen any of the clan… it is almost unbearable. Please come see me, lethallan. For my sake.

Your friend,

Theron

* * *

_In Theron's cabin, near sunset_

Theron is sitting on the edge of his bed, thinking to himself, when he hears a light knock on his cabin door. He shakes himself from his thoughts and looks at the door in curiosity and a hint of suspicion. _Who could that be? I wasn't expecting anyone…_

Theron slowly stands up and grabs his Dar'Misu, the one he has had since childhood, and cautiously walks to the door, ready to thrust at the first threat he sees. He slowly opens the door, hiding his blade just behind the it. He opens the door enough to be able to stick his head through, then he sees a familiar looking elf.

"Merrill!" Theron shouts in pleasant surprise, throwing his Dar'Misu toward the floor point first, causing it to stick in standing up. Theron quickly opens the door and hugs Merrill. Merrill almost jumps back in surprise before hugging him.

"It is so good to see you again, lethallan," Theron says, releasing Merrill and beckoning her into the cabin, closing the door behind her. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, Theron," she responds. "What about you?"

"I'm a little tired, but it's fine. I guess you got my letter?"

"Yes. Isn't that the Dar'Misu Master Ilen gave you when you turned seven?" Merrill asks, noticing the blade sticking into the floor.

"Huh? Oh! Yes it is." Theron yanks it out of the floor and sheathes it in it's holster on the stand near his bed. "I thought that you might have been an assassin."

"Why would you think that?"

"Long story. Let's just say that there are people who don't like me very much."

"Why not?"

"I'd rather not get into it. It's… complicated."

"Don't say that! Now I want to know even more."

"Sorry Merrill. Now… about you and the clan."

"I knew this was coming… I can't tell you. I don't want you to hate me too." Merrill sits on Theron's bed, visibly upset.

Theron sits next to her on the bed and places a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I won't hate you. You have my word."

Merrill looks at Theron and quickly looks away in shame. "Please don't make me tell you…"

"You know I only want to help. Please, tell me."

Merrill takes a deep breath and responds, her voice breaking, "I took the eluvian with us from Fereldan…"

"You… took the eluvian? With the clan?"

"Yes…" Merrill hides her face in her hands, afraid of Theron's reaction.

_** The**__ eluvian? But, she was there when Duncan destroyed it. He explained it to all of us…_

"Why?"

The question seems to surprise Merrill, because she quickly lifts her head up and looks at Theron in confusion. "You… you aren't mad?"

"I'm just surprised. I never thought that anyone would think about going back into those ruins, let alone go in and take the eluvian."

"I didn't just take the eluvian. I'm trying to fix it."

"But, aren't you worried about getting the taint? I barely survived it."

"Don't worry. I purified it."

The word 'purified' caught Theron's attention. _How would anyone be able to cleanse the taint?_ "What kind of old magic cleanses the Blight?"

"It's not exactly old magic…"

"What magic did you use then?"

"Blood magic. I even summoned a spirit to help."

"Blood magic? That spirit you summoned isn't a benevolent one. It's a demon. You need to stop. Please."

"But, what about our history? The eluvian could reveal so much that was lost to us!"

"I know, but it's not worth it. Both me and Tamlen were given the taint and nearly died, and now you are working with a demon and using blood magic. Can't you see that this is costing more than it's worth?"

"It **is** worth it, though! Don't you- What do you mean you **both** nearly died?"

Theron sighs. _I shouldn't have said that. Tamlen… Why did it have to be you who disappeared?_ "Tamlen didn't die because of the taint…"

"How did he die?"

"I… killed him." Theron lays down across the bed and covers his eyes with the palms of his hands.

"You… You killed him? Why?"

Theron takes a deep breath and sighs, but doesn't move or say anything.

"Theron?"

"He was changed by the taint. One night, during the Blight, we were attacked by shrieks. We wiped out the shrieks and when I turned around, Tamlen was standing there with a dagger, trying **not** to attack me. His skin was black and he had no hair. He looked like he hadn't eaten in days. When he saw my face, he ran to the far side of the camp and dropped the dagger. I ran after him. I was just glad that he was alive and I wanted to help him. But… Wynne, Morrigan, and Alistair said there was nothing we could do… that the best thing we could was to show mercy and… kill him. I didn't want to. I wanted to help him, cure him. In my head, I knew it was the right thing to do but… he was my friend. Alistair offered to do it but, I told him that it had to be me if anyone was going to do it. So I drew my blade and I… I slit his throat. I buried him right there and planted a seed on his grave. I gave him the best funeral I could… It was the least I owed him. He deserved better than that. He deserved to go down fighting… Like a warrior. Not killed out of mercy…"

Theron fought back the tears that started to form in his eyes. He hadn't talked about this since Leliana asked him about it all those years ago, and yet it still wasn't any easier to talk about. _It was my fault. If I pulled him away from that cursed eluvian he'd still be alive._

Merrill places a comforting hand on Theron's knee. "I… didn't know. No one did."

Theron slowly sits up and wipes his eyes, suddenly more exhausted than he was after killing the archdemon. "Please Merrill… don't fix the eluvian. All it has done is cause anyone who comes near it to suffer. Please get rid of it. I beg you."

"I… But I cleansed it. It's safe now."

"The taint was only part of the problem. It will never be safe for anyone. For the Creators' sake, you run the risk of being possessed by a demon! Just to fix the thing!"

Theron realized that he was starting to get more and more angry. He took a deep breath to calm himself before he spoke again. "It's not worth it to fix the eluvian. The clan has shunned you for it and now you are living in an alienage, surrounded by humans in a city full of Templars. If the Templars find you and learn you're a blood mage, they'll execute you on the spot without a second thought. That's what they do. I know Hawke can help you and that he isn't afraid of the Templars, but what happens if he isn't there to help?"

"I still have Varric and Aveline. They can help me if I need it."

"That's not what I meant. Merrill, just get rid of the eluvian. You're in more danger now than you've ever been and I don't want you to die because of that cursed thing. Please get rid of it. Take it as far away as you can and forget all about it. You're safer with the clan than anywhere else."

"But what about everything we could earn from it?"

"Some things are better left forgotten. This is one of those things."

Merrill is silent for a while, obviously thinking about everything that was said. Theron waits patiently and hopes she will listen to him.

"I… guess you're right. I'll get rid of the eluvian and head back to the clan."

"I know you want to help our people, but we have a new homeland in southern Fereldan. I know for sure that it will last us for many generations. Longer, if I have anything to say about it. You should let the clan know about it."

"The clan already knows. We've known for over two years now."

"Two years? Why is the clan still on Sundermount?"

"We lost the halla shortly after we camped. I think it has to do with the corruption near the peak."

"You lost the halla? By the Dread Wolf, why didn't the clan try to contact me? I could have helped."

"No one knew where you were or how to contact you. If we knew how to get to you, we'd have done so sooner."

"I… Maybe that's my fault. I have been a bit secretive. I should make up for that."

"The clan would be thrilled if you returned, even for a little while."

"I don't know… I'm set to head back to Amaranthine tomorrow. I have to get back to Vigil's Keep. Someone has to take care of things."

"Why does it have to be you then? Isn't there someone you trust enough to take over?"

"I… Hmm…" Theron had never thought of that before. _Can I really just leave Vigil's Keep in Nathaniel's care, and go back to the clan? I guess it's his right anyway…_ "I guess it couldn't hurt."


	5. Theron & Nathaniel

_From Theron to Nathaniel at Vigil's Keep_

Nathaniel,

I know you are wondering why I'm not on the ship. The reason I am not returning is that I've found my clan and I've decided to return to them. I am leaving you in charge of Amaranthine. Permanently. Give everyone at Vigil's Keep my best.

Your friend,

Theron

* * *

_Vigil's Keep main hall_

Nathaniel, reading the message in confusion and some suspicion as it could easily have been forged, checks and double-checks the letter to make sure that it isn't a joke. _He's… leaving me in charge? __**Me**__ of all people?_ There is always the possibility that this is a forgery, made to discourage a search for Theron. But, something about the letter made it **feel** genuine. Nathaniel looks left and slightly downward to see Oghren leaning on the frame of the doorway, arms crossed.

"Well, what does it say?" Oghren asks, in his usual grizzled tone.

"Theron isn't coming back," Nathaniel replies plainly.

"Why not? What the sod is the reason?"

"The letter says that he found his clan. You know what he means?"

"'His clan?' Well, he did say that he was one of them Dalish elves. Said something about trying to find his clan one day. Guess he finally found 'em."

"He's Dalish? No one ever told me that."

"Well that would explain his sodding tattoos, now wouldn't it?"

"Alright, I see your point."

"So, who's he leaving in charge? Probably me of course. Ha-ha!"

"Actually, he's leaving me in charge."

Oghren bursts out laughing, nearly falling on the floor. "Ha-ha-ha! And here I thought you couldn't make a joke!"

"I'm serious Oghren. Look for yourself."

Oghren takes the letter from Nathaniel's hands rather forcefully and reads it. "Why that little… Sod it!" Oghren practically throws the letter back Nathaniel in frustration.


	6. Coming Home

_**A/N:**_ This chapter has quite a bit of elvish in it, especially towards the end, so don't worry if you don't understand some of the words. Translations will be at the end of the chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

_On one of the routes on Sundermount._

Theron had been waiting for hours, but Merrill still hadn't shown. To pass the time, and to prevent him from thinking too much, he decided to practice with his blades. He started with his throwing knives, aiming at the notches of a nearby tree. He first threw them one at a time, then two, then three, nailing every target with each throw.

After placing each knife back onto his belt, he drew his Dar'Misaan and Dal'Thanu to practice swings and counters. To help, he visualized the movements an enemy may make, whether to swing or block a blow. He visualized a large group of darkspawn, made up mostly of hurlocks, attacking from all sides. One hurlock, hefting a huge great sword, swings on an upward angle, a blow that could have hit him just below the ribs had it been real. He flips over the imaginary blade, following through with a roll towards an imaginary hurlock archer. He thrusts with his Dar'Misaan, coming out of the roll, a blow that would have hit the hurlock in the lower chest, puncturing the heart on it's upward angle. Pulling the blade back, he turns and lets two hurlocks charge at him before he twists to dodge their downward attacks, following through with a reverse twist, swinging his Dal'Thanu at neck height to one of the imaginary hurlocks, for a decapitating blow. Reversing his twist again he swings his Dar'Misaan, aiming for another decapitating blow. A split second before the blade makes contact with the imaginary hurlock's neck, Theron stops abruptly, noticing that Merrill is watching from behind a rock, shrouded in bushes.

"Merrill? What are you doing?" he asks, sheathing his weapons.

"Watching you," she responds, climbing out of the bushes and standing up. "You have gotten much better since you left the clan."

"Just keeping my skills honed. Never know what you'll run into. Did you tell Hawke you were returning to the clan?"

"Uh… yes. Yes, I did."

Theron raises an eyebrow. "You sure?"

"Of course I'm sure."

"Ok. What about the eluvian?"

"It's gone."

"Good. We're all better off with it gone. You ready to go back to the clan?"

"I… don't know. They really don't trust me…"

"Don't worry. I'm sure that they will be too focused on me returning to have time to not trust you." Theron chuckles, trying to cheer up his friend.

"Heh, you may be right. Let's go."

Theron and Merrill start down the path towards the clan's camp. After a couple of minutes of walking, Theron stretches his hand out in front of Merrill, signaling her to stop.

"What is it?"

"Bandits ahead."

"Where? I don't see anyone."

"Behind the boulder over there. They have the path lined with traps."

Merrill strains her eyes, but still sees nothing out of the ordinary amongst the various ruins, rocks, and plant-life on and around the path. "Are you sure? I don't see anything."

"I'm sure. Stay here while I go ahead. I'll call for you if I need help, so be ready."

Merrill nods in acknowledgment as Theron walks ahead. After expertly avoiding every single trap on the path, the bandits, about a dozen or so, walk out in front of Theron, blocking his path. Theron sizes up the group: three archers, one crossbow, three wielding two weapons, two with large battleaxes, and three more with small buckler shields and a longsword or an axe.

"Well, well. Look what we have here," starts the leader of the bandits, hefting a large battleaxe. "A little elf who's a bit lost. That's some valuable stuff you got. You steal it?"

Theron shrugs off the insult, being used to humans treating him like that from time to time. "You don't pick your targets well, do you? You obviously have no idea who I am."

"Don't care much who you are. All I know is that you got to have a lot of coin to have expensive stuff like that."

"I'm giving you one chance to walk away. Leave. Now."

"You must be really brave or really stupid to threaten us." The leader draws his weapon and his followers do the same. "Get 'em boys!"

Several of the bandits charge at Theron, but he doesn't move a muscle. The first bandit to reach him slashes downward with both his weapons. Theron simply pivots away from the attack on his right foot. The bandit doesn't expect the maneuver and stumbles forward. Theron stretches his foot out to trip the bandit, causing him to land face-first into the ground, allowing Theron to bend down, snap the bandit's neck by violently twisting his head, and take the bandit's weapons. By the time he straightens himself, blades in hand, another bandit thrusts with his longsword. Theron simply deflects the blow with his borrowed blade, twists, and reaches around the shield to stab the bandit in his side. A third bandit swings his battleaxe high, aiming for Theron's head. Without so much as a glance, Theron ducks to avoid the blow so that it decapitates the second bandit. He yanks the blade out of the bandit's side, reverses his grip on both weapons and stabs downward, deep into the third bandit's back. Yanking both blades out of the bandit's back, Theron turns and charges at the bandit using the crossbow, deflecting arrows and dodging crossbow bolts during the sprint. When he reaches the bandit, he makes three quick alternating stabs to the bandit's gut. He leaves one blade in the bandit's gut, twists the crossbow out of his hands, and fires it one-handed at yet another charging bandit, nailing him in the eye. He tosses the crossbow and yanks his blade out of the bandit's now limp body. Realizing he has an archer on either side, Theron does a lateral body spin as two arrows are fired at him, one sailing above him as the other flies underneath. During the spin, Theron tosses a throwing knife at one of the archers and it finds its mark, hitting the archer in the forehead and penetrating his skull, entering his brain and killing him instantly. The arrow that flew above Theron hits the other archer square in the chest, piercing his heart.

Theron lands on both feet after the spin and checks his surroundings. Only five bandits remained: two with buckler shields, one with dual weapons, one archer, and the leader. Theron goes on the offensive yet again, charging at the remaining dual-wield bandit. The bandit charges at Theron rather than preparing to block an attack. The tactic proves fatal as Theron slides on one knee with his other leg stretched out in front of him, both blades in a reverse grip and his arms crossed across his chest, slicing the bandit's thigh. Theron stops himself, and in one fluent motion, pivots on his toes and heel and stands up, slicing at the bandit's neck, decapitating him. He turns and deflects an arrow towards one of the bandits who is wielding a buckler shield. Amazingly, the arrow hits the bandit in the eye, killing him. Theron charges at the archer and rolls forward to dodge an arrow, stabbing upward into his chest. Theron releases both blades, seizes the archer's longbow, and takes an arrow. He quickly turns around, draws back, aims, and fires the arrow at another charging bandit leaving the leader on his own. Theron grabs another arrow, turns around and draws back, then aims at the leader's head just moments before he reaches him. The leader stops dead in his tracks, drops his weapon, and holds his hands up.

"O-o-ok! You win! You win! Please don't kill me!"

"I'll let you go if you vow **never** to return. If you do, next time I won't be so merciful."

"I-I-I will never come back. I'll get as far away from here as I can!"

"Good. Now go."

The leader quickly turns and runs back to Kirkwall, passing Merrill on the way. Merrill walks toward Theron as he recovers his throwing knife from one of the dead archers and starts disarming the traps.

"You… killed them all so quickly," she starts, somewhat in shock about the speed and deadly efficiency Theron displayed in the fight. "Where did you learn to do that?"

"Nowhere really," Theron replies after disarming the last trap. "It was all instinct. No thought involved."

"But… you were so calm the whole time. I don't understand."

"It's… hard to describe. I sort of… shut down mentally when I'm in a fight. I let my body take over."

"Really?"

"Pretty much. Like I said: it's hard to describe."

"Could you teach me that?"

"You? I don't think so. It's different for mages. You need to think about what you are trying to do. You can't just feel and move a certain way to cast a spell."

"Is that how you killed the archdemon? You let your body think for you?"

"Uh… That's a different story. One I'd rather not think about too much."

"Why not?"

"Let's just say I didn't exactly come away from the battle unscathed. Come on. The clan awaits."

Theron starts off down the path towards the clan's camp. Merrill hesitates before following. After a few minutes of walking, they reach the outskirts of the camp and are great by two Dalish hunters.

"Andaran atish'an lethallin," greets one of the hunters. "What brings you here?"

"Andaran atish'an. I am returning from the Banalhan."

" The Banalhan? Theron? Is that you?"

Theron simply smiles and nods his head. The hunters look at each other, one utterly overjoyed and the other shocked. They both look back towards Theron before one runs off to tell everyone about Theron's return.

"Can we go in? I have longed to return for many annaren."

"Of course Theron. The entire clan missed you."

"Ma serannas." Theron and Merrill enter the camp and only step a few steps in before the entire clan embraces Theron. There is a lot of cheering, hugging, and all around joy at his return. Merrill doesn't join in, however, fearing that she will be noticed and cause everyone to forget their happiness about Theron and return to hating her. The clan starts to calm down as Keeper Marethari walks toward them, and moving out of her way as she heads toward Theron, who is at the center of the crowd. She stops in front of Theron within arms reach.

"Da'len?" she asks. "You've returned?"

"Of course I did, Keeper. The clan is my arla." The Keeper smiles and embraces him in a hug. Then, the cheering and hugging start again with even more enthusiasm. Theron lets everyone let out their excitement and relief, causing him to somehow end up under a pile of laughing children, laughing with them. Merrill smiles, but restrains herself from joining the crowd, somewhat enjoying the lack of attention towards her.

Theron looks at Merrill with a large smile on his face before being tackled by one of the more rowdy children, causing Merrill to start laughing.

_ It's good to be home…_

* * *

Translations:

Andaran atish'an: Enter this place in peace. A formal elven greeting.

Lethallin/an: Similar to cousin or clansman. Lethallin for males and lethallan for females.

Banalhan: "The place of nothing" or the Blight.

Annaren: Annar: year. -en: suffix, indicating plural

Ma serannas: My thanks/Thank you.

Arla: Home.

Dar'Misaan: Elven longsword. Actual definition: "to be a blade of one place."

Dal'Thanu: Elven waraxe.

Dar'Misu (mentioned in _Theron & Merrill_): Elven dagger. Actual definition: "to be a blade that acts alone."

Eluvian: Mirror.

Definitions courtesy of the Dragon Age wiki (can't put the actual url...).


	7. Hawke's Mother is Missing

_**A/N:**_ Time for Hawke's mother, Leandra, to go missing. A little soon in the story, I know, but I want to get it out of the way so I can get on to the Qunari attack. This is a few months after Theron has returned to his clan and Hawke and Merrill have gotten pretty close in that time.

Hope you enjoy it!

* * *

_Theron's aravel_

In the time Theron had been with his clan, he had heard about everything the clan had to go through in the time he was gone. The journey north and around the Waking Sea, which had taken up most of the year Theron had been off fighting the Blight, had been a hard one. No one had been hurt on the trip, thankfully, but their arrival to Sundermount resulted in losing the halla. After that there was the occasional band of bandits getting too close for comfort, then Merrill trying to rebuild the eluvian and Hawke arriving with Asha'bellanar's amulet and summoning her near the peak of the mountain.

While Theron was grateful that Flemeth had saved both his and Alistair's lives at Ostagar, he always knew she had something else planned beyond the Blight. The fact that she saved Hawke and his family from darkspawn, then asked him to deliver the amulet only proved that. Her plan of survival proved unnecessary, as Theron took her deal and lied to Morrigan, telling her Flemeth was dead. Theron had never planned to kill her though, because, since he was Dalish, he had a deep respect for the woman… or whatever she was.

In the months that had passed, the Varterral in Sundermount had grown aggressive and Theron had to go in and kill it to make sure it didn't hurt any more of the clan. Merrill had joined him and they found Pol, but he was still terrified of her and he ran right into the Varterral. They saved him, but only just. Merrill had been leaving a lot to join Hawke on his 'adventures,' as she called them.

Theron heard a knock on his aravel and went out to see who it was. He turned and saw Merrill with a look of concern on her face. "Is something wrong?"

"Hawke's mother is gone," she explains.

"Gone? Are you sure this is a problem?"

"Hawke said that a man gave her white lilies this morning, and she never came back from going to Gamlen's house."

"White lilies? Didn't Du Puis say that the man who murdered his sister sent her those flowers just like he did with the other women who disappeared?"

"Yes."

"Alright. I'll help. Tell Hawke I'll be looking around Lowtown. If I find anything I'll let him know."

"Thank you, lethallin."

Theron goes back into his aravel to put on his armor and grab his weapons as Merrill heads off to Kirkwall. _So now I'm dealing with serial killers… Not how I thought I'd end up, but as long as I'm helping people._ When Theron turns around he sees one of the younger of the children watching him curiously.

"Where are you going?" the child asks.

"I'm going to Kirkwall for a while. Why?"

"You are taking your weapons and wearing your armor. Are you going to fight someone?"

"I don't know. Probably not, but it's possible. Are you worried I won't come back?"

"A little."

"Don't worry," Theron responds with a reassuring chuckle. "I've survived a lot worse than the shem'len can throw at me."

"But, why are going to the shem'len city?"

"To help a friend. Not all the shem'len are bad people. Some are very nice."

"Is that why Merrill left too?"

"Now or when Hawke came with Asha'bellanar's amulet?"

"Now."

"She left for the same reason I'm going. Don't worry, we'll both come back." Theron pats the child's head as he leaves his aravel and heads to Kirkwall.

* * *

After about an hour's walk, Theron arrived in Lowtown. The streets were always empty at night, save for the bandits and criminals that plagued the city. After a few minutes of walking, he noticed a small pool of blood. He walked over to it and crouched next to it, holding his hand above the pool, almost touching it. _Still warm._ He looked us and saw another pool of blood. He walked over to it and saw yet another pool. _A trail of blood? This isn't good…_

Following the blood trail eventually leads to an old, abandoned foundry. He enters the foundry and looks around, eventually finding a hidden hatch in a corner. Opening the hatch, he climbs down a ladder and ends up in a dimly lit passage. The air smells of rotten eggs and iron. _Great. Blood magic._

* * *

After talking to Gamlen, following a trail of blood, and finding a hidden hatch in the abandoned foundry, Hawke, Aveline, Merrill, Anders, Fenris, Isabela, Varric, and Sebastian enter a dimly lit passage. Hawke summons some fire and uses it to light up the whole passage, revealing piles of ash and corpses everywhere. The corpses have been decapitated or have slits in the skulls, indicating throwing knives thrown with great precision and then recovered.

"Whoever was here before us encountered demons and undead," Fenris states.

"Merrill, didn't Theron say he would be in Lowtown?" Aveline asks.

"Yes. I think he already came through here," Merrill responds. "See the slits in the skulls? Must be his throwing knives."

"And he fought them all on his own? Impressive," Fenris remarks.

"If Theron is ahead of us then maybe he found Mother," Hawke finally says, an edge of hope and urgency in his voice. "We need to keep moving."

Aveline and Sebastian nod and the group starts walking further down the passage. As they continue moving, they see more and more piles of ashes and corpses strewn about. They eventually find Theron as he cuts down one last demon and turns around.

"I was wondering when you'd catch up," Theron starts, chuckling and sheathing his blades. "Fighting these demons and risen dead is slow work."

"Have you found Mother?" Hawke asks.

"Not yet, but… there is something you should know."

"What?"

"Whoever this man is, he is using blood magic to summon these demons and raise the dead. I'm afraid that your mother may be a thrall of the blood mage or…"

"Or what?"

"She may be being used as a blood sacrifice."

"No! I won't let that happen!"

"I'm sorry, but you have to accept it as a possibility."

"No, I don't. I'm going to save her with, or without your help." Hawke starts off down another passage, passing Theron on the way. Theron and the others look at each other and follow him, Theron jogging to catch up to Hawke and match his pace.

"Hawke, I know you're upset, but you need to prepare yourself for the worst."

"Why? I'm not going to let her die at the hands of this man."

" And I doubt you would, but we may already be too late."

"I don't believe that."

"I'm not saying you should, but just brace yourself in case we are."

"Are you going to help me find my mother or not?

"I am, but if you don't-"

"Then go scout ahead."

Theron gives Hawke a long, hard look before picking up his pace and disappearing around the corner. _I will save you Mother. I promise._

Hawke rounds the corner and sees Theron staring intently at something. "What did you find?"

"Doesn't the woman in that portrait look like your mother?" Theron asks, pointing towards a large portrait which sits above a make-shift fireplace.

"Yes. It… does. What is this?"

Out of nowhere, shades, rage demons, and corpses rise and encircle the two.

"Blast! Looks like we have to fight them to get to Mother," Hawke says, grabbing his staff.

"No. You go ahead, and I'll deal with them," Theron orders, unsheathing his blades.

"Are you sure?"

"I can handle them. Go!" Theron starts banging his weapons together to get the attention of the shades and rage demons that were going to attack Hawke and heads the opposite direction. Reluctantly, Hawke sprints off and rounds a corner, leaving Theron alone to fight.

* * *

Theron slices a few shades and demons as well as decapitating a few corpses. A few seconds after Hawke leaves, Merrill and the others come, sprinting, from the passage he and Hawke were at. They all unsheathe their weapons and start charging into the fight.

"Hawke is further ahead! Go!" Theron orders. Aveline, Anders, and Sebastian stop in their tracks before heading after Hawke. "I said go!" Theron cuts down a few more corpses and shades as Isabela and Varric turn to follow Aveline, Anders, and Sebastian. Fenris starts cutting down a few shades while Merrill stands still, unsure whether to help or listen to her combat hardened friend. "Merrill, go! Now!" Reluctantly, Merrill sprints off to catch up with Hawke and the others.

Theron decides to let Fenris stay, knowing that he needs the help against this many shades and demons. The corpses are easy pickings, however, as Theron decapitates one, then another, then a third, then throws his throwing knives at three more, hitting them all.

Fenris is just as lethal, shattering skulls with his greatsword and cutting demons and shades in half with huge swings. They work in near-perfect unison, watching each other's back and communicating with each other to call out enemies.

They make quick work of the remaining shades and demons and look at each other with approving smiles.

"Nice work, Fenris," Theron compliments.

"You as well, Theron," Fenris replies.

"Let's catch up with Hawke and the others. They might have found his mother by now."

"Good, I can't wait to get out of here." Theron and Fenris head down the passage that everyone else went and round the corner, seeing everyone standing around Hawke as some of them turn to see Theron and Fenris with looks of sorrow on their faces. Theron and Fenris approach slowly and Theron finally gets a good look at 'Leandra.' She had gashes around her wrists and neck and was wearing a wedding dress. Her hands weren't actually 'hers', and Theron doubted that was the extent of what was replaced. She was limp in Hawke's arms as he held her, weeping. _Dead? What happened to her?_ Theron felt the air around him shift as Hawke started to lose control of his emotions and, by extension, his magic.


	8. Hawke's Grief

_In Quentin's lair_

"Hawke? Are you ok?" Theron asks, with no answer.

"Hawke?" Aveline asks, with the same result.

Hawke slowly stands up, lifting his mother's body, then turns and walks to the exit. Everyone moves out of his way, unsure of what he will do next. After he passes, everyone looks at each other, concerned. Soon after, one by one, they follow Hawke out of the Undercity, in silence.

* * *

_The next day, in the Hawke estate_

Hawke hadn't spoken to anyone other than Gamlen about his mother's death, and Theron knew he had to do something to help his friend. _His mother died in his arms. What will I say? What __**can**__ I say?_

Merrill sat on an bench near the front door to the estate, elbows on knees, hands clasped together, head lowered. Merrill hadn't said much either to anyone besides Theron, and what she did say, was about Hawke and how much she wanted to help him. No one knew what to say to Hawke. The only one who could come close to understanding his pain was Aveline and even she was at a loss for words. Theron had thought about talking to Hawke, but he was afraid that all he'd do was make things worse. He never had to help someone grieve before. He didn't know where to start.

Then he remembered how everyone helped him after Tamlen died. They didn't know what to say, but just the fact that they were there to help him made him feel better. "Merrill. I think we should try to talk to Hawke."

"But… what will we say?"

"It doesn't really matter what we say, as long as Hawke knows he has someone who is there for him."

"How do you know?"

"It helped to know that everyone was there for me when Tamlen… well, you know."

"It did? I guess Hawke should know that I- I mean we, are there for him."

"Merrill, I know you care about him. A lot."

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. And don't worry, it's fine. Hawke is a good man."

"He is, isn't he? Alright. Let's go talk to him."

Merrill stands up and heads to Hawke's room with Theron. When they reach the door she takes a deep breath and opens it, entering the room. Hawke is sitting on his bed staring blankly at a wall as they enter. His eyes are bloodshot and the smell of alcohol is thick in the air with several bottles strewn across the bed and floor, one standing upright at his feet. He reaches for the bottle and lifts it to drink it, but Theron puts his hand over the mouth of it and gently pushes the bottle back down. "Hawke?" Theron asks. "Are you alright? Merrill and I decided to check on you to see if you were doing ok."

"How do you think I'm doing?" Hawke responds, with some pain in his voice. "My mother just died in my arms…"

"I know what that must be like, but we're here for you. All of us."

Hawke is silent for a while, holding the bottle in his hand and still staring at the wall. "You know what the worst part is? If I had been faster, fought harder, I could have saved her…"

"Hawke, you shouldn't blame yourself," Merrill says, resting a hand on is shoulder and sitting next to him on the bed.

"Then who should I blame? You? Theron? I was supposed to keep her safe and I failed. Whose fault is that?!"

"No one's," Theron says as calmly and sympathetically as possible. "It isn't your fault that Leandra died. She died because a very lonely, very deranged man thought he could reverse death."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?"

"Hawke, I know what it is like to lose someone that close to you right before your eyes. You did everything you could."

"I could have done **more**."

"I know it feels that way but, there wasn't anything else you could do. Now, I didn't know your mother for long, but she seemed like a good woman. She wouldn't want you to crumble like this."

Again, Hawke fell silent, this time for much longer. After a few minutes of silence, Hawke spoke, "I think you should go…"

"Ok. You know where to find me if you need anything."

Merrill stands up and they both turn to leave, but Hawke gently grabs Merrill's hand. She stops and looks at him, unsure how to react to the sudden gesture. "Please stay, Merrill," he says.

Merrill looks back to Theron, as though asking him if she should. Theron smiles and nods before Merrill sits back down next to Hawke. Theron turns back to the door and leaves the room, shutting the door behind him. _They make a good pair._


End file.
